time to begin again.
thoughts on a new year + reads and vibes for your weekend.
We’ve reached the last Friday of 2023 - we made it!
I don’t know about you but I feel blessed. If you haven’t subscribed yet, please drop your email below, and let’s jump into this week’s chat.
thoughts at large.
Someone recently asked me if I had resolutions for the new year, and I do not. I’ve learned over time that resolutions do not work for me, and that’s okay.
What I do have, however, is a desire to live my best life - and make the most out of every moment I have. The truth of the matter is, we don’t know what the new year will bring. Anything can happen. 2020 proved that. So instead of waiting for Monday to start something new, I’ve already begun making the changes I want to see in my life. I have the tools to make the improvements - all I have to do is decide to make them and be consistent with that decision. That’s the toughest part though—the moment when you realize that you are the author of your story, and the only thing stopping you is you. Your only responsibility is to write it and allow God to publish it.
With that said, I know there is a level of privilege in that statement - there are people who are dealing with generational challenges, health issues, etc. And while I believe that there’s hope in every situation, I’m not talking about them. I’m talking to you, the moderately healthy privileged person who has been living below their potential due to fear of judgment, discomfort, or some other innocuous thing that doesn’t really matter in the long run. I am speaking to you, and I am speaking to myself.
Since I’ve been off of work for the last week, I’ve gotten the opportunity to slow down. The slowdown has allowed my brain the space it so desperately needed to chill, reflect, and challenge myself to think about how I want my 2024 to be different than previous years. Honestly, 2023 has been an exercise in improvement for me. In some (many) ways, I have gotten better. In other ways, I’ve plateaued. I will say however, I haven’t gotten worse. For that, I’m grateful.
I’m approaching the end of this year with the mindset of an opportunity to begin again. Right now - today. Not on Monday - today. That’s the energy I’m taking into the new year. If it can be done now, why wait for some ceremonial date? Just do it while it’s on your mind - and see it through to completion. You have to learn to do what works for you, not what works for the general public. If you don’t - you’ll find yourself in a cycle of repetition, unfulfillment, and unhappiness. I am off that. I hope you are too.
I want to leave you with a few tools for planning and getting organized.
Earlier this year I talked about the 12 Week Year - and while I think it’s amazing - I tried it and did not carry it through. 🤷♀️ I didn’t have the right tools, but now I think I do. If you do this right, it’s a great way to zero in on execution, which is my word of the year. I found a Notion template that will help me track my progress toward goals. You can grab it for free: 12 WEEK YEAR NOTION TEMPLATE.
I’ve been using a timer to track the time I’m spending on tasks. Each side has a time block and as you turn it, it sets that time. 5 minutes, 10 minutes, 30 minutes, 60 minutes and so on. It’s been really helpful for me. You can grab it from Amazon: CUTE BUT EFFECTIVE TIMER.
This is just a random tip but I’ve started blocking my calendar. This is a very mid-30’s millennial thing but it’s true for me - if it ain’t on my calendar it’s not happening. So I put everything on there. Block out time for lunch. Block out time for the hot girl walks. Block out that nail appointment. Whatever you need to do - put it on your calendar of choice and stick to your calendar. It’s helped me to create structure in my life.
Finally, an anecdote and word of encouragement: do not feel pressured to make monumental shifts in your life this weekend, before the new year begins on Monday. Sure, take some time to assess your current situation, and how you’d like to see it change, and then make one step toward that goal. I’ve found that trying to overhaul your life can be difficult to maintain. Once that motivation dries up you’ll stop. But if you make those small, incremental changes, those will add up to the grand shift you’re hoping to see.
Do you have any tips for getting organized or making improvements in your life? Share those with me in the comments.
Happy New Year, my friend. I hope that you don’t wear yourself out trying to clean up, plan your goals, or cook greens and black-eyed peas this weekend. I mean you can totally do all of those things but I also hope that you take a moment to enjoy this transition in time.
🥂 To new beginnings!
reads + vibes.
GQ: How The Ultimatum: Queer Love’s Mal Wright Became a Menswear Style Star - Random, but I saw Mal in the airport in Austin last month and they are indeed very very fly. I really enjoyed reading this profile and I hope you will too.
Andscape: Russell Wilson’s benching and the casual disrespect of Black quarterbacks - At this point, I don’t know what to believe about why Russell Wilson has been benched for the remainder of the season, but I do know that this piece broke down something true for many years - that people don’t think that a Black QB can be a real play caller or intellectual leader. Of course that made me feel like this:
AdAge: PLANET FITNESS INTRODUCES MOTHER FITNESS IN CAMPAIGN WITH MEGAN THEE STALLION - You want to talk about brand alignment? This is excellent. Megan also has a collaboration on the way with Nike for apparel, so the hotties can get healthy and look fly in the new year.
In a sea of year-end lists, I decided to make a playlist of my favorite R&B songs from this year, and I’d like to share it with you now. Remember these are my favorites, if you have others you can make a playlist too. LOL.
Check out 2023 in R&B on Spotify or on Apple Music and let me know what you think.
That’s all for this year fam. Next week, I’ll be sharing some thoughts around dating and relationships in the social media age. Get strapped in for that. In the meantime, be well & be happy.
